


Don't Hold Your Breath

by changelic



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Babydontcry!au, KaiSoo - Freeform, LittleMermaid!AU, M/M, mermaid, suchen - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-23
Updated: 2017-09-23
Packaged: 2019-01-04 09:03:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,772
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12165774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/changelic/pseuds/changelic
Summary: Jongin and Kyungsoo belong to the ocean.





	1. Chapter 1

Title; Don't Hold Your Breath. 

Author; Channie

Pairings; Kaisoo

Genre; Fantasy, Romance, Fluffy-angst. Mermaid!au.

Length; prologue + three-shot{?} - incomplete

Soundtrack; Never let me go - Florence and the machine  
https://8tracks.com/changelic/don-t-hold-your-breath

 

Summary;   
Jongin and Kyungsoo belong to the ocean.   
Seawater runs in their veins. 

Trigger Warning; This fic contains mentions of death and suicide.

Disclaimer; The ideas, plot line and text of this story belongs to chan-gelic {wattpad} and little-channie {aff}, changelic (ao) Any copy, translation or rewrite without permission and credit is plagiarism and will be reported as such.

The characters in this fics are based on real people, and by writing this story I mean no offense to them, their managers, co-workers, family, friends or fans alike. It is merely a representation of my imagination for entertainment purposes only. 

Channie/Aurora (2014)


	2. #1  -prologue-

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was as if salt water ran in their very veins.

\-----

 

Jongin woke as he did every morning, to the squawking of sea gulls and the warm sun kissing his cheeks through speckled sea glass windows. It was warm enough that his duvet had long since been stored away in his closet and instead he lay alone on the cool cotton sheets, sweat beading along his hair line.

With a groan he sat up, ruffling his already messy, chocolate hair. "I'm going! I'm going!" With a grunt he grabbed for the half empty bag of bread on his bedside table, pulling out a piece which he then tore into little pieces. Opening his window was a struggle, between the rusty hinges and a hand full of bread, the 7 year old had to use all his strength, but the window eventually swung open with a satisfying bang.

"Here you are gullies!" He called out gleefully, throwing his bread outside the window and onto the roof of the beach house. He spent a few minutes watching the birds fight over the food before pulling his window shut again and climbing out of bed.

Pajama pants were switched for board shorts, and carpet was switched for old wooden stairs as Jongin ran down to the kitchen, calling out to his mother happily as he went. "Mum! I'm going to swim with Kyungsoo!" He swiped a mango from the fruit bowl on the way past, and quickly darted out onto the sand.

Jongin loved his house, it was a bit old, and a bit small. But it was directly on their own little beach, stepping out the back door put him straight onto the sand, less then 100 metres away was the ocean itself. But what he loved most, was that in the little beach house tucked right up against his, lived another little boy, Jongin's best friend Kyungsoo. They did everything together; ate, swam, played, studied. They were closer to brothers then friends, and together they belonged to the ocean. It was as if salt water ran in their very veins.

"Soo, soo!" Jongin called as his feet hit sand, the boy ducking under some low hanging tree branches as he ran to the house next door. He grinned when he saw his friend sitting on his veranda, smothering himself in a ridiculous amount of sunscreen. "Good Morning Jongin." The other murmured as the Jongin approached, tongue sticking out as he tried to rub sunscreen into his cheeks. "Soooo~ hurry up!" Jongin whined, laying down across the wooden paneling. "I wanna swim!"

Kyungsoo huffed, turning his chin away in defiance. "Help me, then. You know I get all fried if I don't put this on."

"I know, I know." Jongin laughed, abandoning his mango so he could do just that. He started to rub the lotion into Kyungsoo's legs, being careful not to miss a spot. "I wish I tanned like you.. I've never seen you wear sunscreen in my life." Kyungsoo continued to grumble, sighing when eventually they'd rubbed in all the lotion.

Getting to his feet, Kyungsoo yelled something in Korean, Jongin thought it was something like, "Mum I'm leaving now", returned by a "Be careful, I love you". But he wasn't really sure, he so rarely spoke Korean with his own Mother. 

"Race you to the water? " Jongin offered, but Kyungsoo was running before he finished the sentence, leaving Jongin with a face full of sand. He whined before taking off after the other, reaching the water just moments after.

"Hah! I win for once." Kyungsoo yelled triumphantly, jumping through the shallows in  victory. Jongin huffed and splashed some water at him. "Whatever, you can't beat me at swimming, come on lets go."

The two kids took off into the water, swimming out until their feet didn't touch the ground. They waves were bigger than usual today, towering high and crashing loudly. Kyungsoo paused to watch, treading water.

"What's the matter Soo?" Jongin yelled over the noise, frowning when he noticed Kyungsoo had stopped.  
"The current is really strong today.. and the waves are... a lot bigger.."  
"Don't be afraid, you're a heaps good swimmer now. You got this, hyung!" Jongin grinned widely before diving underneath the water, letting a wave catch him and carry him back towards the shore. When the force died down he resurfaced, waving over at where Kyungsoo was.

"Come on, Soo--" Jongin stopped when he couldn't see the other. He must have caught a wave already. Jongin hurriedly made his way back out, eager to surf again. However even as he made his way back out; Kyungsoo was nowhere to be seen.

"Soo? Kyungsoo! Where did you go!" His call was met with a terrified scream that Jongin barely heard over the water. Jongin's head whipped around like lightning.

Kyungsoo was much further out now, hurriedly being dragged out into the sea ocean. "  
Jongin its a rip-- I can't... I'm stuck!" Kyungsoo was frantic, scrambling to keep himself afloat.

"Soo! Sideways, you gotta swim sideways!"  
"Jongin I can't it--" another shrill scream was cut off by a wave, Kyungsoo once again disappearing from Jongin's sight as he was knocked under the water.

Also screaming, Jongin quickly dived under, frantically making his way out to where he'd last seen Kyungsoo, he popped up occasionally, desperately looking around for his friend. Shrieking his name, but he was nowhere to be found.  
"Soo! It's okay I'll find you I--"

Jongin didn't know how long he'd been searching when he was pulled into his step-father's arms, he could barely make out the beach and he was trembling with exertion, but he fought nonetheless, refusing to get onto the little boat that had seemingly come out of nowhere. 

"No! Soo! Soo I'll find you. Hyung!" he sobbed.  
"Shh Kai it's okay, everyone's looking, its okay sweetheart.." Jongin shook with terror, sobbing into the towel that had somehow become wrapped around him.

"It's all my fault, he said it was too strong, he was scared, Dad it's all my fault."

Jongin stayed on the boat all day, and all night.  
They never found Kyungsoo.  
And Jongin never swam again.

\---

hope you enjoyed this short little prologue. the proper story starts next chapter. see you then.


	3. #2 -the fall-

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Hey ocean, it's been awhile."

"What do you mean I'm not coming over?" Jongdae seemed quite upset with him, a hand slapping onto his forehead to check his temperature. "You're not sick so what's the excuse?"

Kai squirmed. "Am just busy."  
"Next weekend then ?"   
Jongin didn't know how to tell him he meant indefinitely. The thought of not spending another weekend with Jongdae saddened him, but it didn't deter him.  
"Yeah, I mean. I think so?"

"Alright then." Jongdae side eyed him before standing as his stop approached. "See ya Monday then, Kai. "

"Yeah, bye Jongdae.." Kai swallowed. "And just, thanks for everything."

Jongdae frowned, turning back. "You're welcome... are you sure, you don't want me to come."

Jongin put on his best smile. "Yes! Now get going before you miss your stop."

 

It was weird to think that would be the last time he'd see Jongdae. He was sad. But also determined. If there was any thing he truly didn't deserve, it was the raw joy and loyalty of Jongdae. 

The lulling of the late bus ride slowly put Jongin to sleep, country roads flying past his eyes like a silent movie until his eyes fluttered closed. The silence following Jongdae's departure was eerie, but Jongin found it comforting. This was what he truly deserved. 

He dozed most of the way home but eventually the bus creaked to a halt at its final stop, a rotting bus shelter a 30 minute walk from Jongin's house. It was off-road from here in, a dirt track leading down the coastlines rocky cliffs to many secluded beaches, one of which he called home. Thanking the bus driver and waving him farewell as he crawled back down the road Jongin didn't take the dirt road home, instead he veered off down the trail leading up the cliff face, hands clutching tightly at the straps of his bag. 

It was a long, steep walk but eventually the roaring of the ocean rang in Jongin's ears, the trees parting out into a dirty cliff.  The wind whipped Jongin's hair wildly, but he remained calm, gently placing his things down by the trees. 

His backpack, his shirt, his shoes; closely followed by his phone (a-lit with messages from Jongdae complaining about how his mother hadn't made him dinner cause she hadn't expected him home), his keys and a few folded pieces of paper all of his which he piled up neatly. 

He then, silently turned to the cliff, slowly making his way towards the edge. 

"It's been awhile ocean." He whispered as he crept closer. But then he paused, clearing his throat before standing tall. He spoke louder this time, bellowing into the wind.

"It's been a long time, since you took my friend." He took another step. "And I'm here to tell you of your mistake. I'm the one you should've stolen. I've amounted to nothing, you were but one of many lessons... and yet, here I stand.. " his voice fell quiet again. "Worthless... I know, you cannot return him. But, I selfishly ask that you take me too.." his voice broke. "I can't do this anymore... any of this, I.. Soo, I'm sorry... to waste the gift you had stolen.." 

He took a step back, bracing himself before with no hesitation. He leapt off the cliff, barreling through the night sky and into the dark water. The splash wasn't loud like he'd imagined, but fell silent in comparison to the monsterous waves and roaring wind. Drowned out, silent again. The reality gripped Jongin's threat like a noose as suddenly he was enveloped in black. 

He wanted to scream, his ribs were on fire and he couldn't tell which way was up. He'd silently hoped he'd hit the rocks, that he wouldn't have to float like this, suspended in the pure form of his own fear.  But at the same time he felt peaceful; blind, floating through a fog of desperation. His lungs burned, but it was a dull ache compared to the weeping of his heart. The last thing he saw from tangled in a web of kelp and bubbles, tossed around by the waves, was Kyungsoo's face. He was much older now, his expression looked concerned, even when warped through the water. 

Jongin supposed he should've felt guilty, but instead he felt at peace, smiling as his eyes fell closed.


	4. #3 -fortune-

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Sorry, my phone died."

Jongin woke up coughing, salt rubbing his throat raw as water spilled from his lungs and back into the ocean. He trembled as he tried to catch his breath, eyes clenched closed.

Once he could breathe again, he glanced around. It was still dark, and he was draped over a rock in waist deep water. A closer look revealed to him that not only was he miraculously at the beach, but directly out the front of his house, a good mile down the coastline from where he had originally jumped. He screamed weakly in frustration, panting for air as he slapped at the rock.

"For fucks sake, I can't even drown myself right." He sobbed, eventually going limp on the stone. "You win again ocean." He sighed, slowly pulling his legs under him so he could wade his way to the shore. 

His whole body hurt, but it didn't hurt as bad as his pride. "Even the ocean doesn't think I'm good enough." He grumbled as he plodded up the sand to his house, arms wrapped loosely around himself to protect him from the evening sea breeze. 

Averting his eyes to anywhere but the house next door, Jongin climbed up the porch stairs and in through the back door, the smell of his mother's cooking instantly assaulting his nose.

"Yeobo, is that you?" His mother called out from the kitchen, back turned as she stirred something in a pot. "Did you see the boys by any chance? I haven't heard from Jongin all afternoon."

He coughed weakly before calling out to her. "It's me, umma! .. Can you bring me a towel?" His voice was hoarse and he sighed, coughing a few more time to clear it. A minute or two later Jongin's mother appeared with a towel, looking extremely confused at the sight of her very wet son. 

"Hello Jongin.. where's Jongdae?" She looked confused, handing over one of the towels in her arms. "Why are you wet.." her eyes widened. "Were you, swimming?"

Jongin shrugged, using the towel to wipe both the excess sand and sea water from his body. His mother began to help by ruffling the other towel through his hair. "Yeah, just felt like it."

His mother tried to hide her shock, her teeth digging into her lip as she pulled back to look at him. "That's great, baby. Was.. the water nice?"

Flashes of inky water and slamming waves flashed through Jongin's mind and he paused for a minute, caught up in the memory.

"It was perfect" he muttered, taking the second towel from his mother before heading into the house, "I'll put these in the washer.." he murmured as he disappeared around the corner, head still hanging.

"Jongin, wait!" His mother called, causing Jongin to pause and look back momentarily. "Jongdae?"

"Oh, no... he's uh, not coming this week."  
His mother huffed.  
"A little warming would be nice next time. What am I supposed to do with all this extra food?"

\--

Jongin spent most of that night laying awake. His lungs stung, and the bruise lighting up his side from where he'd hit the water stung, but that wasn't why he tossed and turned. He was lost in thought, maybe's and could have been's swimming through his mind like a school of fish.

He wasn't supposed to be alive right now, he didn't know what to do. He'd left all his stuff up by the cliffface too, meaning that if he was to wait awhile before his next attempt, he'd have to go and collect it all. 

Should he even try jumping from the cliff again? It hadn't worked at all the first time, but then again, it was just luck that had washed him to shore. Right?

What hung with him most however, was the flash of Kyungsoo's face. He could see it so clearly in his mind. He looked older now, as if he was still around. The colours were all wrong, and his face was painted with a look of such concern. Jongin sighed, rolling over to once again try and sleep.

He'd try again, but he'd have to wait until tomorrow. He had the weekend to get it right. Surely he couldn't keep messing it up. 

\--

Jongin was woken up that morning by a loud banging on the front door. It was Saturday, so his parents had long since left to go to the city, with a groan he tumbled out of bed, clutching at his aching side and hurried to the front door. 

He opened it to a boy who looked about his age, wide single lidded eyes blinked at him, there was something about the way they slanted that put Jongin on edge. 

The stranger smiled, his lips curling at the corners. "Hi, your Jongin right? I found these by the cliff... their your's yes?"

Jongin frowned before gently taking the pile of stuff into his hands. "Uhh, yeah. They are. Thanks, you didn't have to bring them down.."

"Oh it's no problem I was passing through anyways." His eyes suddenly narrowed, drawing forth such a menacing look Jongin stumbled over his own feet. "Be careful near those cliffs."

And with that he turned on his heel and left, leaving a very confused Jongin, clutching at his bag in terror. He quickly shut the door, traipsing up to his room as he went though his phone.

He must've had at least fifty texts from Jongdae, ranging between. "Why are you so quiet, I'm bored" to "how dare you make me go home, my mum didn't even cook me food cause I always go to yours."

Jongin snorted, thumbing back a "sorry, phone died." as he dumped his stuff in the corner of his room. 

He flitted about for a little while longer before, with a face of determination, he once again left out the back door, trudging up the path and through the forest.

He'd been smart enough to leave his things at home this time, taking nothing more than the clothes on his back as he made the trek up the hill to the cliff. After some time he was once again faced with the view from last night, it was a lot calmer this time, the wind still ruffled his hair but it was much softer and the hot midday sun burnt at his cheeks, almost as if it was encouraging him to leap into the cool water.

Jongin had no greeting for the ocean this time, instead he just stepped over the edge, plummeting through the air and into the water, sneakers and all.

The splash was loud this time, easily heard over the still midday sun. But still he was enveloped quickly, tossed about by a following wave until again, he was a little unsure which way was up, he tried not to think too hard about it, kicking his way towards darker water, just to make sure he didn't escape this time.

He felt strangely calm, floating limply as his lungs once again were slowly lit to flames. He found himself waiting for Kyungsoo's face, begging that it would appear again. 

He wasn't let down. Just as he felt his head was about to explode, there was the perfect image of his grown up friend, hand outstretched. 

Jongin breathed in, and blacked out once more.


	5. #4 - resurface -

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I'm not afraid."

Jongin threw himself off the cliff a total of three times that day. And every time, he washed up on the shore near his house a few hours later, sore and disheartened. 

Jongin sighed from where he lay sprawled out on the sand by the front of his house. The urge to try again was so strong, but he held fast. It wasn't going to work, and he knew he was being selfish.

He wasn't jumping to die anymore. That thought had long since left his mind. Sure, he hadn't cared how he'd ended up after he blacked out but, in reality,  
Jongin knew that he was jumping for the hallucination. He was falling for Kyungsoo. Literally.

He snorted at the irony, weakly dragging himself to his feet so he could stumble back up the sandy path. He had to be smart about this, if he was going to succeeded. The sun had long since painted the horizon and it was starting to get dark, but Jongin traipsed on. He was running out of time. He had to get this right soon, before someone worked out what he was trying to do. 

Sandals dragging through dirt and sand, shells and leaves. Jongin didn't know for how long he followed the coastline, eventually arriving at cliffs so steep, he had to climb his way up the edges. Soon he came to the top of a huge pointy structure, a wide rocky surface flattening out before him. It was a lot higher than his previous cliff, so much so that it seemed like a kids warm up in comparison.

The wind was deadly, whistling past his ears and lashing into his cheeks, Jongin could barely stand against it as he stared at the ocean spread before him. There wasn't a beach in sight, only monstrous waves and sharp rocks. 

His arms felt like lead, but Jongin held them out anyways, slowly tiptoeing across the uneven stones towards the edge of the cliff. He sucked in a sharp breath.

"I'm not afraid!" He screamed, eyes tearing up as the wind lashed on. "I'm not afraid, Kyungsoo." He took a few steps back, attempting to make way for a run up. This was it. If this didn't kill him, nothing would.

Jongin shook in terror, his scream a pure lie. Even just thinking about leaping into the wrath of Poseidon below terrified him to his very core. But Kyungsoo flashed through his mind once more and it all scattered away. He took two leaping steps forward and flung himself down towards the water.

The fall was longer than usual, but soon Jongin hit the water with a sharp slap, his hips bashing across the side of a rock as he tumbled into blackness, he hadn't even gained bearing of his limbs when seconds later a wave threw him head first against the same rock structure , blood beginning to leak out his nose.

Jongin spun in the water a few seconds longer before he couldn't stay awake any longer, the banging in his head ringing too loudly. His eyelids fell closed, empty and blank. There was no Kyungsoo. 

 

 

\--

 

"What the fuck Kyungsoo, your not supposed to rescue drowning people. Come on, he'll wake up any second we gotta go."

"I don't care, someone's gotta beat some goddamned sense into his thick skull."

"Yeah but not you! He's a human you can't talk to him! You can't even let him see you!"

Jongin stirred, the yelling seemed like a far away nightmare, garbled and distant. His head throbbed, but not as bad as his lungs, within seconds he was once again heaving salt water, the strange conversation forgotten.

"Kyungsoo he's awake we have to go!"

"Go then, Sehun. But I'm staying and talking to him."  
There was a loud splash, it sounded like someone had been shoved into the water.  
"Fine but I'm telling Suho!"

Jongin groaned, attempting to rub away the sting in his eyes. "Who's there..". He grunted, finally gaining enough vision to squint around. He was draped over a rock again, a little way out from.. was that the beach in front of his house? Jongin whimpered in frustration, slapping at the rock pathetically.

"How!? This can't have happened again.. not again... I.. how is this even goddamned possible." He croaked sadly, tears gathering at the corners of his eyes. 

"You're an idiot."

Jongin frowned, freezing at the sound of another voice. He pulled himself up onto the rock properly, sitting on it with his arms wrapped around his chest;  
Maybe he wasn't hallucinating. His eyes scanned the water, and sure enough, right in front of him, a figure was hovering in the water, only a pair of eyes and mess of red hair sitting above water. 

"Umm... who are you..."

"You're an idiot!" Suddenly lifting up out of the water, the person starting splashing water at Jongin angrily. 

Jongin flinched, trying to both block the water and have a look at who this person was. It only took him a few seconds before his arms darted out, grabbing hold of the other's wrists to hold him still before so he could look properly. Jongin squinted before tearing up.

"Kyungsoo..?"  
"I--" the redhead flailed, trying to pull away  
"No, it is. It's you. I swear to god it's you"

The sorrow in Jongin's eyes froze Kyungsoo in place, his arms falling limp.

".. yes but. But that's not the point! What are you doing throwing yourself off cliffs! Are you trying to get yourself killed? Cause you almost did! Like five times--"

The rest fell on deaf ears, Jongin still caught up in Kyungsoo's grown up face. The red hair was for sure a shock, and so was the strange purple texturing that danced down his jawline and his neck. But it was Kyungsoo for sure and Jongin couldn't help but start to cry.

"I thought you were dead.."  
"I mean, I was but... Wait are you even listening to me?!"  
"Your so purple... are you cold? Here get up here with me, I'll help you"  
"I really don't think that's a good idea, Jongin I--"

Kyungsoo shrieked as Jongin dragged him closer, he then dropped his wrists so he could secure his arms around Kyungsoo's waist. One struggled heave and he had the other boy up on the rock with him.

Only, he wasn't a boy. From his waist stretched down the most beautiful fish tail. Purple and blue scales glistening whilst huge trailing, fins stretched down to the water beneath him. 

Jongin shrieked, back pedalling so fast he fell off the side of the rock with a splash.

"Jongin!" Kyungsoo screeched, attempting to get himself off the rock. A few seconds later however Jongin's head popped up through the water and he breathed a sigh of relief. 

"Look this isn't important, what's important is you not cliff diving. Do you know how dangerous that is?"

"My best friend, who I thought drowned, has been alive and well for years, as a goodamned mermaid. And your telling me that jumping off cliffs is more important?"

"I, umm, well... when you put it that way I guess, also I'm not a mermaid, the correct term is merfolk. Wait why am I telling you this I'm not even supposed to let you see me.."

"I can't believe it. How are you even real,  
a godddamned mermaid. I must be dreaming"

"Merfolk and--"

"But how did this happen-"

"Jongin! Look, okay. " Kyungsoo frowned, splashing water in his past friends face to get his attention. "That doesn't matter cause you almost died today. More than once! If I hadn't been around to hear you, or Sehun to heal you.."

"That was kind of the point Soo, I was trying to die." A hard slap landed across Jongin's cheek and he cringed, averting his eyes.

"You idiot. Of all people, do I have remind you how precious life is."

"But Kyungsoo, I"

"I don't bloody care, Jongin. Your going to get your butt to shore and get on with your bloody life. And if I catch you jumping again I swear to god, I'll wash you up at the coast guard station."

"No! Kyungsoo I don't wanna go back I can't. Especially not when I know you're here,  
How am I supposed to." Jongin paused, once again taking in Kyungsoo's form. "I don't deserve it anyways."

"Look I'm not even supposed to talk to you, Jongin, I could get in huge trouble for this. So we're taking you back to shore, and I never wanna see you cliff diving again. Cause maybe I just won't save you."

"No, Kyungsoo! You just can't come back like this and then... and then leave me again. No I can't..." Jongin heaved himself back on the rock, placing his hands on the other's shoulders.

"We're going to catch up, and your gonna tell me everything. Or Else, I'm gonna throw myself off this cliff every waking moment." 

Kyungsoo sighed, managing to finally slip himself back in the water. "Fine. I'll come back here. Tomorrow afternoon. But if I hear you've tried to throw yourself off another cliff, you will never see me again. Deal?"

Jongin nodded eagerly, wet hair flicking droplets of sea water about. "I promise, I won't."

Kyungsoo sighed, slipping under the water for a moment before resurfacing. "Well good, cause all that rescuing was exhausting. I.. do you need help getting back to the beach?"

Jongin shook his head. "No I can swim, we're not far out." 

Kyungsoo shrugged. "If you say so."

Wincing Jongin glanced back at the shore, he was right. Kyungsoo hadn't even been out this far when he'd... when he left.

Jongin glanced back, only to find the merman gone. 

"Kyungsoo?" His smile quickly disappeared when he couldn't find the other. Letting go of the rock he slowly began to swim back to the beach, paddling slowly until his knees grazed the sand.


End file.
